Holidays. I love the holidays. I love many things about the holidays. I can honestly say that has always been the case even through the toughest times.
My dad passed away on December 14th, and as tragic and devastating as it was, we tried to make the most of the holiday. Of course, we thought we were doing it for my mom’s sake, but I think it was a survival mechanism. It definitely made us much more aware of how important family is. Although bittersweet, as missing your dad never goes away, it was heartwarming as we gathered at my mom’s house to celebrate together.
Fast forward another few years, and my husband walks out on December 4th. What is it with December! Enjoying this holiday was a little harder, as I was not myself or anyone I remotely recognized. And I had to try to hold our children together, as well. But even though I held them each as they cried in disbelief, pain, and non-understanding, I was very grateful to have them all with me. Even with our lives turned completely upside down, spending the time together and trying to focus on the meanings of the holidays was, if not healing, at least a short-term bandage.Write comment (0 Comments)
Who Says I Can't ?
If we hear something often enough, we not only begin to believe it to be true, we come to accept it as-is.
When our children are little, we tell them they can do it, they can scoot or crawl from one spot to another. We tell them they can take that step without holding on or sitting down to crawl. Do they believe what we say so much so that they just do it? Or do they believe in what we say just enough to actually try it?
Trying new things is so much easier when someone is telling us we can do it, when we have supporters and encouragers we tend to attempt new things. This can also be bad, as in the problem with peer pressure. It can be good in getting us to step outside our comfort zone and experience things we may not be familiar with, or even have a fear of.
Now step to the other side. Someone tells us repeatedly we cannot do something. Do they actually know we cannot do it? How do they know? I mean, did they see us try something we can’t remember trying and see us fail, so now they know we cannot do it? Sounds silly, right?Write comment (1 Comment)
Does Single Define Me?
Reflection time: I am single. Not that single defines WHO I am, it is only a part of what I am. I am first a Christian, mother, sister, and a friend. “Single” is just one of those labels attached to me. It is a label that I dislike the most! You would think that being divorced 6 years, I would finally be comfortable with this, but I am not. I should be enjoying figuring out who I am. Most days I do. Then there are those days that just get the best of me.
Day after day, it is the same routine. Go to work, come home, eat, sit in front of the TV or the computer, stay up way too late, go to bed, get up, go to work…Write comment (1 Comment)
Learning to trust again…
Now that you have gone through or are going through a divorce, how do you trust anyone ever again? The person you were the closest to totally broke your trust. Won’t everyone else follow suit?
I know I wondered about everyone, even my own family. I mean, if my husband could lie to me and break my heart, couldn’t anyone?
I found myself punishing nearly everyone for what my husband had done. I didn’t want anyone to be able to hurt me like that. I even had trouble trusting my children.Write comment (0 Comments)