Happy Mother's Day!
As Mother’s Day approaches, I have lots of mixed feelings. Being divorced seems to make so many things difficult and yes, that includes Mother’s Day. It is in my decree that I have the children on Mother’s Day just as it is in there that my ex has them on Father’s Day. But it is still difficult, especially when the kids are too young to drive themselves. When they are little, they tend to get to make gifts in school for moms. Most of the time I actually received the gift. So cute and so loving coming from our babies. However, at a certain point they no longer spend school time making gifts. At this point in my previous life, I would get nothing or a handmade card. My ex stated I was not his mother, so why should he take them shopping? Of course, when it came to Father’s Day he was always showered with gifts and cards from me as well as our children.
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Write comment (0 Comments)Hopes and Dreams; gone or simply changed?
What about all of OUR dreams with our former spouse? What about growing old together? What about enjoying our grandkids? What about retiring, traveling, and enjoying the benefits of all of our hard work?
Okay, so not just dreams…simply, what about how I thought my life was going to go? The plan, the vision I had for my life with my “family,” my husband, and children, and grandchildren.
I don’t think anyone gets married with the thought of some day getting divorced.
But when it happens, what now?
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Write comment (0 Comments)Please don't tell me......
How do we support our children and listen to their stories when they want to talk about our ex? Sometimes I just want to scream, “I don’t care! I don’t want to hear about what my ex did or said.”
I know I can’t do that as it would make our child hurt, angry and less likely to share other things. Children have a need to go on, to treat many things as they did before the divorce. They have a deep desire for their parents to still love each other, a different kind of love, but love nonetheless.
How do we as parents share things with our kids without saying” don’t tell your mom or dad?” Not that we are talking bad about the other parent or have anything to hide, but we just feel our new lives are none of their business.
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Write comment (0 Comments)Dating with Children
How do you know you are ready to date? More importantly, if you decide you are ready to date, do you share that with your children?
Those of us who share custody have an advantage when it comes to dating. It is not something we have to tell our children, as we have the ability to date on nights the children are with the other parent. But do you tell your children that you are, in fact, dating? Or maybe the correct question is, when do you tell your children that you are dating?
That question needs to be answered way before you introduce them to anyone you are dating. I don’t think it should be sprung on them all at once. Guess what? Mommy is dating, and this is Bruce.
And I do not believe they need to meet everyone you go on a date with. There is a difference between going on a date with someone and dating someone. The latter alludes to multiple dates with the same person.
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