Happiness or Significance
As I was scrolling through Facebook, I happened upon this writing mentioning my blog. A reflection, a look back and forward , by our dearest friend and co-blogger Karen:
Reflection time: "We" are all searching for happiness. That searching goes in many directions. Some search in their jobs, finances,possessions, or relationships. The more we search the less satisfied we are. It is a void that in some aspects is never filled. This left me wondering if it is happiness that we are looking for,or is it significance?
Try and follow my thought process. It may go off in a hundred directions, I promise to try and stay on course! ;)
I want to focus on searching for happiness in relationships. I have spent some time traveling down the road of "if I had a partner then I would be happy". As if I am not complete or don't have any value because I don't have a "partner" to share my life with. I've had a few relationships since I've been divorced. I use that term loosely because two of those were just disasters and not relationships at all. All three have been life lessons, but only one counts as a true relationship.Write comment (0 Comments)
A Cloak of Failure
When something goes wrong why are we so quick to accept guilt? I spent some time today chatting with a dear friend. Hadn’t talked to her in awhile and she had been on my mind quite a bit lately. So I typed a brief text and hit send. It was almost immediate that my phone rang. After a few minutes of how are you, what is new she made a comment that I seemed to always know just when she needed me. Then I knew something was up. For the next hour and a bit she filled me in on what has been going on in her life. I love how God knows just when we need each other.
After listening to her talk and putting in my 2 cents here and there one proverbial elephant in the room stood out. Things were not going exactly how she had thought they would, or envisioned they should, so of course she was a failure……………………Write comment (0 Comments)
A Little Flashback to see how far we have come
Here is a little story about a woman who one day found herself at 45 years old trying to figure out what her life was all about. She had been someone's daughter, and then a wife at 18 years old; shortly after she became a mother. Never knowing who she was or what she wanted she woke up everyday doing the best she could by her children and her husband despite what was going on around her. She did all she could to survive. Then the day came when her children were grown and had their own families, and her husband had his own activities and decided that she was no longer needed or wanted.
She found herself wounded, resentful, angry, and bitter. Full of unforgiveness that would soon begin to eat away at her soul! She wanted desperately to be better and do better. However, every day no matter how hard she tried, all that she could see was the negative going on around her. She could recognize blessings, even acknowledge them out loud, but just never seem to be able to stay in that place of peace.
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She had people tell her that she was weak, desperate, overly emotional, and needy. Not because they wanted to help her, but because they themselves were hurting. You know the saying: hurting people hurt people. This left her feeling hopeless, and full of despair.
Being an intentional friend
Being an intentional friend. An interesting concept. It’s something I have been to many, but perhaps for short intervals of time. When I am mentoring or simply supporting someone going through divorce, I am very intentional. I stay in constant contact via email, phone, text, Facebook, or all of those ways.
So why am I not that way with my friends and family? Why do we let so much time go by with no contact?
Life is busy. Life is crazy. Life is chaotic. But that is true of everyone. Just because your life feels overwhelming, or on the brink of disaster, or out of control, does not mean everyone else’s is peachy keen. And what you may see or feel is borderline life-ending or destroying may simply be a bump in the road to someone else. And visa versa, what you think is a bump in the road of life could be or feel to someone else like the end-all.Write comment (0 Comments)