outside a comfort zone
Talk about outside your comfort zone…
Fast forward now six and a half years. My daughter wanted to attend an event at our church, and we really wanted her to be a part of it, but she was at her dad’s for the weekend. You have to know the whole story to understand just how difficult this was, but I sent an email to her dad and stepmom asking if they did not have plans already if she would be permitted to join us. I offered to pick her up and drop her back off. At the end of the email, I included an invitation for them all to join us. This gesture was way, way out of my comfort zone, but seemed like the right thing to do.Write comment (2 Comments)
Is there a switch?
How does one turn off love? Is there a switch? This question came about as I went through the early, ugly stages of my divorce.
How does someone who promised to love me until death do us part, someone who said "I love you" every day, now hate me with a capital H? As I read texts and emails and listened in depositions and court appearances, I asked myself over and over and over, how can he hate me? Especially in my case, where he was the one who left, who chose divorce.Write comment (1 Comment)
Control. Good ? Bad? What is control?
When you are a woman married to or divorced from a narcissistic man, it is bad. It is painful. It is sometimes hard to see.
I spent 24 years married to a man that I was in love with that I never thought was controlling. But looking back with clearer vision - WOW! He was incredibly controlling. I can see it now; others could see it then. Once I recovered somewhat from my husband leaving and the nasty divorce, although I am still not sure one ever fully recovers, I was at least on my way. Friends would ask me what I was going to do, go back to school? Get a job? Travel?Write comment (3 Comments)
A Revelation ?
I had a revelation of sorts.
As I was driving to work this morning, I was again beating myself up for being so negative and nasty towards society, well people in society, certain people how they behave or what they wear. And even more that "we" are accepting of it. What I am speaking of is women, girls who reveal too much, whether it be in their clothing or behavior. I have been very negative for a long time about it, but it seems to be getting worse and worse. As I became angry with myself again this morning for having such thoughts, I heard something that stopped me in my tracks: all this time being negative ,I have blamed me; maybe I am jealous? Maybe because I have put on weight since my divorce, maybe because I am fat, I am just jealous of them. Perhaps because my ex compared me to those types I am jealous. Maybe because my ex desired them and said mean things to me I am jealous. Maybe because I haven’t been able to erase those things from my mind or heart I am jealous…Write comment (3 Comments)